I still remember that phone call in the summer of 2017 from my friend, Beth. She is a sweet Southern belle with a cute accent that occasionally drops the “all y’all” saying. Beth is what I would describe as the church-going, business owner with an MLM company, mother of 3, that is trying to juggle it all. From her peers and the outside world, she has everything most women would die for, including a supportive husband of 15 years.
As soon as I heard her higher-than-usual voice, I knew something was wrong. She was holding back her tears when she said, “Kari, I think I might have a problem with drinking.”
She was hiding her drinking.
I was personally elated to hear her say those words. I’d been waiting for her to admit that she was hiding her drinking and ready to make some changes. Beth had finally reached her enough, something that eventually needed to happen to make some radical decisions. Beth was the true definition of what it means to be a gray area drinker. She was tired of living a double life of hiding her drinking and appearing to have it all together.
Beth is like so many women. They are trying to be everything to everyone, from the employee to the wife, to the mother, to the maid. It gets exhausting! We are told by society that it’s okay to unwind with a glass of wine every night. What ends up happening for most ladies is that ONE glass slowly turns into TWO glasses that eventually ends up being THREE glasses and so on….
The Mommy Juice Culture
Welcome to the Mommy Juice culture, where normalizing drinking wine daily is not only acceptable, but encouraged.
It’s not your fault. The subliminal messages are everywhere! Let’s look at TV shows like The Real Housewives. You can’t view an episode without seeing alcohol involved. The barrage of messaging is all around us. If you want to be included or have fun, you need to drink. If you want to relax from your stressful day, unscrew a bottle. Everyone else does it, why not you!
The mommy juice culture has become a marketing gem, but at who’s cost?
Are the advertisers there for you as you struggle to get up in the morning for another night of “I drank too much”? How about for when you forgot your kid’s appointment at the doctor’s office because you were tired or too busy, stressed and overwhelmed to remember? Are they there for you when a customer or client gets angry at you for forgetting their order or missed their email?
No, they aren’t. The advertisers are too busy counting their profits.
Alcohol addiction is very prevalent in our society. If you aren’t paying attention to your relationship with alcohol, it could happen to you too.
But it’s not just the wine industry. Society, big pharma, and doctors are pushing anti-anxiety medications. In the United States, 12.7% of the population is currently taking medication, and women make up MORE than half of that number!* Staggering statistics for a society being misled that it’s easier to take a pill rather than work through their anxiety. Yes, many do benefit from taking medication, however, they are other forms of coping strategies than may or may not be offered to the patient. Most of this is related to financial gain from our health care industry.
It’s hard enough to be a woman in today’s fast-paced, need-to-do-it-all society, but when we add in the threat of addiction, it only makes the problems worse. So, what’s the answer?
Education and awareness.
The Gray Area
We need to be educated on the dangers of excessive drinking, even if it’s just a glass of wine every day. That ONE glass may be more than just the standard drink size of 5 oz, and if that’s the case, a lady drinking more than 7 glasses of wine per week is considered to be abusing alcohol.** This is also the place where one might fall into the gray area drinking category. (see the blog post, What is Gray Area Drinking)
When we can be honest with our daily habits and coping mechanisms, we can begin the healing process of facing our truth. Once we see the truth, we can’t unsee it. And that’s where the journey begins.
There are alternatives for women looking for healthy ways to overcome their stress and overwhelm. The key is gaining control with her mindset, implementing daily habits that are edifying, and choosing to face her challenges with a sense of hope. Many women find that working one-on-one with a coach trained in NLP, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and Motivational Interviewing can be extremely helpful and life-changing. She will learn how to process her thoughts that lead to actions, feel empowered with her decisions, and have a sense of peace come over her, as she has never felt before.
Wine and anti-depressants should not be the first thing we reach for when stressed or overwhelmed with our lives. Let’s fight to ditch the mommy juice for some inner strength and power instead.
My friend, Beth, found her inner strength that year. She’ll be celebrating her 3rd-anniversary alcohol-free later this year and in her words, “I’ve never been happier! I have SO much clarity! My husband and kids have the whole me back in their lives. I’m grateful to be in this place and wouldn’t trade it for anything!”
If you resonate with this and ready to make some positive changes in your life, schedule a free Discovery Call today. You deserve to have it all, not just pretend to.
*Source – American Psychological Association & Harvard Health Publishing **Source – National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism
